The Next Evening
Why would you do again what you know hurts me so much? What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you broken like this? You hurt me again and again and again and you never change and your apologies become echoes. It’s your birthday. Why didn’t you respond? Did I make a mistake? No. I knew this would happen. You never fail to disappoint me. There’s little of you beyond the memory to love. I’ve tried. God, you know I have. You see the hell I’ve waded through for so many days with this girl.
She thinks I’ve decided to come back into her life. No. I can’t. She knows if I stopped I’d come back. Because I love her. It’s a fulfilling curse. My heart is in your hands and you treat it without care. I have no means of freeing myself from this. Here I try and here I fail. God you make me miserable. I wish now I was in love with someone else. Why am I like this? Why has my heart decided on this girl?